The results are in...

Firstly- I've been overwhelmed by the support from my last blog- thanks to everyone for your kind words.

It's been a tough time since going in for my op.  Recovery has been slower than I expected- it turns out I'm not a very good patient!  I love the thought of sitting around watching my favourite programmes and reading a good book, but the reality of it... not so great.  I'm not good at being told 'don't do that', it makes me want to do it all the more.  I realise that this advice is for my own benefit, but those that know me, I'm sure will agree, that I'm quite stubborn.  If I've got my mind set on something, there is very little that can or will stop me.  This, however, stopped me; I've been forced to rest whether I wanted to or not!

But I'm on the mend, back at work and generally feeling quite well.  In fact I popped along to my doctors' surgery this evening to collect a 'fit to return to work' certificate.  I knew my results weren't due until later this week, but on the off-chance I asked if they had heard anything.

"I'll check- one minute..."

Longest... minute... ever!

"Yes, they're here.   It's fine."

Me with a blank expression- "What's fine?  You have my histology results?  What does 'It's fine' mean?"

Honestly, I may as well have been asking for the results of a spelling test!  But I read the notes and saw for myself- everything was ok.  In short, they have removed the abnormal cells and surrounding tissue.  There is no sign of invasive cancer and I have to go for a re-test in 6 months to check for further abnormalities.

I can't explain how relieved I am.  Mr T and I have tried our best to avoid the possible outcome of these results but it has hung over us like a dark cloud.  It's there every hour of every day.  Every decision, every plan we made- it factored into the equation.  It turns out that everything is going to be ok- and believe me when I tell you that I am so grateful, we both are- but I can't help but think of how it could have been.

I've spent time looking into the possible treatments had the outcome been different.  It's heartbreaking to think that for some women, this is the reality.  The choices that these women have made, are making now and will have to make in the future are just incredible and my heart goes out to them.  I will always give what I can to Cancer research charities and I will raise funds for this cause when the opportunities arise.

I've had some lovely messages as a result of my blog and I'm so pleased to say that some women have said that after reading my story they have gone to get themselves checked.  If this is you- thank you and well done.  If you're thinking 'I really should go, it is overdue' please go.  Pick up the phone, get it booked and just go- for peace of mind if nothing else.  The sooner anything out of the ordinary is picked up the sooner it can be treated and you can carry on as normal.

This has been such a wake up call.  I intend to look after myself, to overcome the reluctance to put myself in uncomfortable situations if it is for the sake of my health.  I'm one of the lucky ones.  I'm at risk, so I will continue to get myself checked and keep myself safe- I hope you all value yourselves enough to do the same.